


Fast Car

by olddarkmachine



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst, Bittersweet, Goodbyes, Inspired by Music, M/M, Promises, Sad Ending, but at least we know how things actually go so minor brightside?, technically broken promises?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-09
Updated: 2018-03-09
Packaged: 2019-03-29 05:39:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,077
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13920531
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/olddarkmachine/pseuds/olddarkmachine
Summary: Keith and Shiro say goodbye before the Kerberos mission.Curling his fingers into the quilt that separated them from the cool concrete of the roof, Keith tried to anchor himself to the point where his knuckles brushed against Shiro’s thigh.“Keith.”“Please.” The plea was low and gruff, buckling under the weight that had settled across his chest. It was the weight of everything he hadn’t said. Of everything he needed to say. But it was too late. And now Shiro was going to leave.I’ll always come back.Keith had no reason to not believe him and yet a small, malicious voice bit back.But what if you don’t?





	Fast Car

**Author's Note:**

> I listened to [Fast Car by Tracy Chapman](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DwrHwZyFN7M) this morning and ended up with feelings. That’s literally the only reason for this. So, sorry in advance.

“Runaway with me.”

It wasn’t a question, but a statement that cut through the dark of the night and severed the burning tether that had grown between them in the quiet. Keith had been mulling the idea over in his mind for quite some time now. More than just some time. For just about two years now.

Ever since the announcement of the Kerberos mission and Shiro’s part in it, to be exact.

The thought had been a knee jerk reaction to the soft smile and quiet way Shiro had spoken when he’d told him. It was the same way everyone else that had left him had always prefaced their abandonment, almost as if wrapping the bad news in shiny paper would soften the blow. Keith had had to force himself to swallow the bitter taste of his past experiences as his best friend had explained that the mission wouldn’t be for another two years, and he’d only be gone for about a year after that.

“ _You’ll hardly have time to miss you_ ,” he’d said as he’d bumped his shoulder into Keith’s, thankfully keeping the contact to a minimum as if he knew that he’d break otherwise.

This was, of course, different from all the other times. Shiro would come back. He promised as much and he’d never given Keith to ever believe otherwise. Keith was very much aware of the fact, which was how he’d managed to make it this long without saying anything.

Each time he felt the jittering panic start to seize onto his throat, he would soothe it with the fact that Shiro wasn’t like everyone else. He was coming back.

_I’ll always come back._

But it was finally here, and now, looking out over the flat expanse of the desert with the infinite amount of stars stretched above them, those four words couldn’t placate the sudden stab of fear that cut deep into his lungs.

“Shiro,” he breathed, not looking up from where his cheek rested against Shiro’s steady shoulder. “Please. Let’s just run.”

They were supposed to be saying goodbye. A proper one that wouldn’t need to play out in front of the officials that would be at the launch, and here Keith was, messing it up because he just couldn’t let go.

“We could go anywhere. You and me.” The words were a rush as he tried to ignore the way he felt Shiro tense beneath him.

“Keith—”

“We could take the bike. Stay at the shack. I’ve got some money saved up that could buy us some time to figure the rest out,” he continued, ignoring the brush of his name against the top of his hair. Deep in his gut, he felt the cruel twist of panic that sent the burning bite of bile up his esophagus, leaving its bitter taste on the back of his tongue.

Curling his fingers into the quilt that separated them from the cool concrete of the roof, Keith tried to anchor himself to the point where his knuckles brushed against Shiro’s thigh.

“Keith.”

“Please.” The plea was low and gruff, buckling under the weight that had settled across his chest. It was the weight of everything he hadn’t said. Of everything he needed to say. But it was too late. And now Shiro was going to leave.

_I’ll always come back._

Keith had no reason to not believe him and yet a small, malicious voice bit back.

_But what if you don’t?_

“Keith,” Shiro’s voice was sharp as he twisted his shoulder out from under him, leaving him falling for a suspended moment in time before he was steadied by two strong hands at his shoulders. They were firm, but reassuring as Shiro fixed him with his silvered gaze.

Under the night sky, they reflected the bright white light of the stars that he was soon going to join. They radiated with hope and desire and something caught between four letters of a very strong word.

It hurt to look at, so Keith looked away, instead focusing on the frayed corner of the blanket just beside Shiro’s hip.

“Hey,” he said, softer this time as he lowered himself slightly to even the playing field. Keith knew the tactic well. It was one that Shiro used whenever he knew he could feel the inescapable distance of their circumstance spreading between them. He had always told him that never mattered, but how could it not when Shiro was everything he wanted and wanted to be, and Keith was everything that could possibly keep him back.

Wasn’t that exactly what he was doing now?

It was a selfish thing to ask, and he had worked so hard to prove to everyone— most of all, himself— that he wasn’t all that the world saw him to be.

Apparently, he was.

The problem was, he couldn’t bring himself to care anymore. He could swallow his pride and let everyone else be right if it meant that Shiro would stay.

“It’s okay,” Shiro calmed as he dragged his hands over his shoulders and up the sides of his neck until his fingers were buried in his hair and his thumbs were running slow lines over the crest of his cheekbones. It took a moment for Keith to realize that the coolness that followed the tracks was the slick of his own tears.

Gently, as if Keith was something breakable, Shiro urged his face upwards until he was looking at him once more. This close, he could see the dark ring that held in all that molten silver.

“What’s this about?” He asked as he let his thumbs continue to drag his tears across his skin.

It was about everything. Everyone had always given up on Keith. First it was his mother. Then it was his father. Then it was every foster family between his first and the Garrison. He had gotten used to loss and loneliness. Had even thought he was finally okay with the hand he’d been dealt. But then life gave him an apology trapped behind storm filled eyes, a starlit smile, and the human personification of all that was good.

And now it was going to take him away. 

Even with Shiro’s calm reassurances, he could feel the ominous burn that charred his nerves and left them feeling raw.

Everyone leaves. That much was just a fact. In another life, Keith would have let him go without a fight, resigned to the ultimate truth that was his life. He would have just swallowed the bitter pill and then fought through the side effects until it worked its way out of his system.

Shiro was different though.

He had worked his way through the cracks of Keith’s foundation until all his roots were so entrenched within him that everything would need to be ripped up to remove him.

But how could he tell him so much when this entire time he’d put up a front built entirely on the back of a lie?

_I’ll always come back._

Shiro’s gaze was expectant but unhurried as he waited for an answer, all the while his thumbs carefully took him apart with their gentle caresses.

“Nothing. I just—”

_Can’t lose you?_

_Will miss you?_

_Love you?_

The breath shuddered as he dragged it through his teeth as Shiro’s eyes searched his face for an answer to his question.

“Don’t go,” he finally managed as another tear spilt over where it was caught by the tips of Shiro’s thumb. Hand shaking slightly, he raised them to the front of Shiro’s shirt, folding his fingers into the soft fabric of his white t-shirt.

Beneath his knuckles he could feel the beat of Shiro’s heart. It was strong and steady, just like he was.

“Keith,” he said again as he tried a smile that didn’t quite meet his eyes. Deep within them, there was a sadness that was so genuine it hurt more than anything else, if only because for a moment, he saw his own grief in its reflection.

“I’m coming back.” It was a whisper filled with a surety that rang with nothing other than fact, as if there weren’t any other possibility. Leaning closer, his eyes flickered down to Keith’s slightly opened mouth before returning to his tear clouded eyes.

“I’ll always come back. You have to believe that, Keith.” Carefully, Shiro settled his forehead against his, gently brushing their noses together and leaving the slight burn of his skin against Keith’s.

A moment hung itself between them as their breaths danced together in the minute space that separated their lips as he let the words find their mark beneath the younger man’s ribs.

Each was a deliberate cut made so cleanly he almost didn’t feel anything at all. Keith heard more than felt the hitch in his breath as they nestled deep within the muscle of his heart.

“You have to know,” Shiro’s voice sounded wet as his eyes fell shut. “You have to know that I’ll always make it back to you.”

“But what if you don’t?” The words cracked like glass beneath a fist, their pieces hitting the ground sharply. “What if you can’t?”

It was Shiro’s turn to pause, the sudden tension of his question running through him like a hot wire as if it hadn’t occurred to him that the opportunity to come back could be taken from him. Why would it? Fate had always shined on him with all the golden light of a hero.

“Shiro,” Keith finally said after the pause had grown too weighted, trying to pull away only for his grip to tighten in his hair.

And then Shiro was pushing forward, sealing away what space was left between them between the press of their lips. It was as soft as a butterfly’s wing, a gentle brushing of their mouths that sent a shock rocking down to the base of Keith’s spine. His fingers twitched against Shiro’s chest as his best friend pulled away slightly, a low rumble of a laugh vibrating against his knuckles as Keith chased him across the distance.

“I will come back,” his tone was firm and final, his mind made up against any objections Keith or the universe might have. “Then we’ll run away.”

Another jolt as Shiro captured his bottom lip between his. This kiss was harder, and longer, filled with more intent and only ending when Keith’s lips parted around a gasp.

“We’ll go anywhere.”

Another kiss. Another sharp shock that stalled his heart.

“We’ll go everywhere.”

Another.

“I’ll come back, and we’ll have all the time in the world.”

Shiro punctuated each reassurance with a kiss, and vice versa until Keith’s breaths were ragged and his cheeks were hot. He continued until the black, ominous shadow was beat back by the light of his molten, starlight eyes. Pushed on until all of Keith’s objections and fears were swallowed by the burn of a universe growing within his chest.

They only stopped once Keith was tucked into Shiro’s side with his head settled just above his heart as they both breathed in tandem in a vain attempt to gather themselves. Fingers traced up and down the line of Keith’s back, drawing invisible tracks like a map across his skin.  

Above them, the stars twinkled with refined clarity, each a point that Shiro would be following up towards everything he’d ever worked for.

“You’ll come back,” Keith said into Shiro’s chest, more for himself than anyone else. For just a moment, the arm around his shoulders tightened as he felt the soft brush of a kiss at his crown.

“I’ll come back.” The words rumbled through them both, the feel of them making them solid and more real. Holding onto them like a buoy in a storm, Keith rolled them over and over in his mind as he traced the constellations above them and lost himself in the warmth of everything Shiro was.

_I’ll always come back_.

***

**_Sad news today as we receive reports of the loss of the Kerberos mission. The Galaxy Garrison have released a statement that they lost contact with the ship. It is believed to be due to pilot error._ **

Keith swallowed down the lump in his throat as his hands balled into tight fists, his nails cutting into his palms until he was sure he would bleed. Everything fell away into darkness as he heard Shiro’s voice, sure as anything as he spoke.

_I’ll always come back_.

He lied.

***************************

**Author's Note:**

> ~~help writing angst is the only way i know how to battle writers block~~


End file.
